This is my baby:
I know what you are thinking, Internet. You are thinking, “Wow, that is an unpleasant looking child. How unfortunate for Shalini.” What’s better is after four DAYS of labor, that’s the exact thought I had when the midwife put him on my chest. “I did this work for that? Oh dear. Good thing love is blind.”
But don’t worry, Internet. Despite being saddled with a horrific mother, my kid turned out pretty darn well.
Today is his fifth birthday. Five. FIVE. Holy shit, how did that happen?
To celebrate him, let me share some gems that he’s said recently.
Sure you’re older, but only if you mean by age.
When I asked you for a cookie and you gave me fruit instead because you said we had no cookies, that made me sad for you that you think they’re the same thing.
You can’t do that! That’s cheating! Cheating is anything where I lose and anyone else wins. I’m the winner and you’re all losers.
I love this video, especially the part where the little girl dies, because I hate girls.
Happy birthday, Sachi. I love you bunches, even if you used to be really ugly and now you’re kind of a pain in the ass. OK, I might love you *because* you’re kind of a pain in the ass. Apparently love is blind AND dumb. Smooches.
I love the laundry basket picture with K. Have one with my daughter like that too. Happy Birthday Sachi !!
An honest philosopher. He will continue to bring you much joy.
That boy has got a way with language! He’s adorable to boot. You’re lucky to have such awesome children.
It goes by so quickly doesn’t it! Happy Birthday Sachi!
Happy Birthday Sachi!
Happy birthda Sachi – there’s nothing like a mother’s love (and honesty). Crud, now I wonder what my mom said about me when I was little…
That cookie and fruit quote is simply the best.
Happy Fifth Birthday to HIM!!!
I really think we should have the ability to just hit a button and force a two-year rewind on our kids.
Happy birthday, little guy — so glad to see that you’ve inherited your mother’s sense of humor.
Awwwww!!!! He was such a cute little monster
Happy birthday!!!!!
Happy Birthday big boy!!
Poor lady who can’t tell an apple from a cookie.
Happy Happy Birthday, Sachi!
Love,
Your Future MIL
Happy birthday, Sachi! you’re a smart cookie–which is most definitely not the same thing as fruit.
Happy Birthday to Sachi! And good on him for figuring out the Fruit Conspiracy so early in life.
Happy birthday Sachi! Keep fighting the good fight about fruit vs. cookies.
Happy birthday to your little guy. I think my 5 year old has the same rules about cheating!
I also love that cookie and fruit quote. He’s awesome. Happy birthday to him (and happy “gave birth” day to you).
That fruit thing makes me a little sad too. They are NOT the same.
Oh, hush. Your kids are GORGEOUS! Even at birth.
Happy birthday Sachi! And, agree, fruit and cookies are not the same.
I want to hang out with Sachi. Happy birthday to him!!